Sigh 50 is closing in.

I am going to be 50 soon. It is safe to say my life is half over with.

I have accomplished some wonderful things to show for my life so far.

1) I will be married for 27 years this Friday.

2) Zach - Son #1

3) Ben - Son #2

4) My love of hiking

But I have some not so wonderful things to show for my life so far.

1) The scale (i.e. my weight – no you don’t get a picture.)

2) I am not the healthy. My asthma is kicking my but lately. I have not had a physical in 2 years. I really need to find an allergist in Michigan.

I remember graduating from High School and being so full of hope and excitement for the future. I have to admit I lost that excitement over the years. The good news is that I think I have found it again. As I approach 50 I am anxious over the not so wonderful things in my life but more importantly I am excited.

I am excited to find out what I will accomplish the second half of my life. So my wish list for the second half of my life are as follows.

1) Help my children finish High School and College.

2) Grandbabies. I hesitate to list this one because it isn’t up to me. Plus, I hope to not get them anytime soon. However, I really hope I get them sometime in the next 50 years.

3) Work. I have a lot of options I am thinking about. I am debating on starting an Heirloom Vegetable farm. I am also trying my hand at writing. Finally, it would be really cool to start a backpacking adventure company and do guided hikes. I would like to specialize in hikes for women.

4) Be a runner.  I have always wanted to run. I don’t know what draws me to running but I have always been drawn to it. I have started and stopped running numerous times over my life. However, I have never truly felt that I could say “I am a runner.” Which now that I have started writing this I realize that is silly of me. I came to this conclusion when I was trying to determine the minimum goal that I would need to accomplish to feel like I was a runner. What popped in my head was that I needed to be able to run 3 miles. Well I use to do this on a regular basis. Does it matter if I was fat and slow? Looking back on it I realize no it didn’t. I was a runner. So I just need to start running and bam! I am a runner!

However, I would like to do the following.

1) Run a 5K

2) Run an 8k

3) Run a 10k

4) Run a half marathon

5) Run a marathon

6) Run an ultra-marathon

That is my wish list for the last half of my life.

Sauerkraut

I have been trying to make sauerkraut.

When I first read the receipt it seemed really simple. Take cabbage and salt throw it together in a jar and wait. Simple, Right?

Not so much.

With my first try the cabbage didn’t release enough moisture to make brine. The cabbage has to be completely submerged in brine.  I read a couple of different websites that talked about making sauerkraut. I decided I must not have massaged my cabbage enough.

No you didn’t read that wrong. You supposedly have to toss the cabbage with salt and then massage the cabbage until it goes limp and starts to release water.

For the second batch I massaged my cabbage. I think my husband was jealous of the cabbage and with good reason. I haven’t massaged him that long in years.

It didn’t make any difference. My cabbage still didn’t release enough water to make an adequate amount of brine. All the websites I had read said that if you don’t get enough brine then you are doing something wrong.

But I am determined to make sauerkraut. I am tired of my food choices. I need something else. Plus sauerkraut is supposed to be full of probiotics and good for you. I want sauerkraut!

I read more blogs. Then I found a blog post in which the writer made a distinction between store bought cabbage and fresh cabbage. She said that if she uses store bought cabbage she never gets enough brine. Yes, I like this answer and it makes sense. Of course store bought cabbage would be more dried out than fresh cabbage. She also mentioned that her grand something or another would only make sauerkraut at night, during a full moon, in the fall, under an old oak tree, with a bunch of other women.  Supposedly this was the only time the cabbage would sour properly.

I have to say that sounds like to me they sold their husbands and children a load of poo poo and had a party.

So I began to wonder if all this massaging was really necessary.

Once again I bought a head of cabbage. I chopped it all up into nice thin slices. (At this point I am getting really good at chopping cabbage.) But this time I made a strong brine. I used 3 cups water and 5 tablespoons kosher salt.

I came to this amount of salt because the receipt I am using calls for 5 pounds of cabbage and 3 tablespoons salt. Unless you use kosher salt which I am, then you need to use 1 ¼ times the normal amount of salt. Plus to make brine the receipt calls for 4 cups water and 1 ½ tablespoons salt. I had about 4 pounds of cabbage from my head. So I figured about 2 ½ tablespoons salt. Adjusting for kosher salt I just called it 3 tablespoons. Then to make brine I needed another 1 ½ tablespoons. So I just rounded it off to 5 tablespoons. The reason I used 3 cups of water is because to dissolve the salt in the water to make brine you have to heat it. But then you have to let it cool before adding it to the cabbage. I skipped the cool down and just added 2 cups of ice. I figured 2 cups of ice melted should be about 1 cup of water.

After I had my 4ish cups of strong brine, I tossed the cabbage in the brine. Then I started cooking my beans. (I was making chilly.) Then I tossed the cabbage. Then I ground rice flour. Then I tossed the cabbage. Then I mashed bananas. Then I tossed the cabbage. Etc. Etc. Until an hour-ish later I had banana muffins made and hadn't let my beans burn. What happened to the cabbage? It looked just like all the websites said the cabbage should look like after it had been massaged enough. It was all nice and limp and wilty and had started releasing moisture (at least I think there was more brine).

I followed the rest of the instructions like I was supposed to. I weighted down the cabbage. I pushed it down once a days. I kept it covered. It sat on the counter and bubbled away.

Now a week later what do I have? Sauerkraut! It may be a little salty. Next time I am going to use 4 ½ tablespoons salt but I suspect that I will eventually go down to 4 tablespoons salt. Other than that it tastes wonderful. Granted I don’t know what homemade sauerkraut that gets massaged properly and doesn’t need brine tastes like but I think mine is just fine.

So if you are nuts and just want to make homemade sauerkraut or maybe your body is crazy like mine and reacts to store bought sauerkraut give it a try.

 

Brownies

Okay, I have worked out the kinks in the brownie recipe. I will admit that they are a little on the dry side but I haven't been able to fix that without causing the brownies to fall in the center after they are done baking. But they are egg, dairy, soy, flax seed and gluten free.  This is a really hard combination to achieve when baking.

Brownies

Dry Ingredients

1 1/2 cup Rice flour
1 1/2 cup Oat flour
1/2 cup Tapioca or Arrow Root Starch
2 cups Sugar
3/4 cup unsweetened Cocoa Powder
1 teaspoon Baking Powder
1/2 teaspoon Salt

Wet Ingredients
1 cup Water
1 cup Olive Oil
1 teaspoon Vanilla Extract

Other
1 cup Walnuts

Directions: Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit. Mix dry ingredients in a large bowl. Mix wet ingredients in a small bowl. Pour wet ingredients into large bowl with dry ingredients. Add Walnuts and mix. Pour in an 8x12 inch pan and bake for 25-35 minutes.

Side notes: I don't use an electric mixer for this recipe. I use a rubber spatula. If you aren't using an electric mixer just make sure the dry ingredients are well incorporated with each other. Also, I don't oil my pan before I use it. The brownies will be crumbly and you will need to use a metal spatula to remove them from the pan any way.

Also, why are both of these utensils called a spatula? It is very confusing in the above paragraph. I changed it to a "rubber" and "metal" spatula (even though my "metal" spatula isn't a "metal" spatula it is hard plastic.....just saying)

What's in a name?

Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner.

Those are powerful words. They pack so much meaning and even can illicit an emotional response.

There are specific foods for each words.

Muffin = Breakfast.

Sandwich = Lunch

Grilled Chicken = Dinner

But why?  Why must we eat specific foods at only those specific times?

Hello World. My name is Sheila and I have abandoned all preconceived notions of breakfast, lunch and dinner foods.

Yes, I serve my children leftover grilled chicken and vegetables for breakfast. I pack my children muffins and granola  bars for lunch most days.

I will admit that Dinner generally stays sacred but that is only because the few actual breakfast foods we can eat are generally saved for breakfast and lunch. Plus, I don't have a good bread recipe so I don't make bread very often.

Vow = Sooner or later I will perfect my bread recipe. (but for now it is edible at best)

 

Disney World with allergies and sensitivities.

The mention of Disney World in my last post got me to think about our Disney trip.  I wanted to mention a few things that most people don't know and Disney World doesn't widely advertise.

Did you know you can take food into Disney World? Yep you can. If anyone asks just tell them you have food allergies. Yes, I told them allergies not sensitivities. I did not want to go into the details and I am sure the person at the gate didn't want me to go into details either. We never bought anything but water when we were at Disney World. Even then we would all carry in a bottle of water and refill it from drinking fountains. But a couple of days it was hot and we just wanted cold water so we bought cold bottles of water a few times.

We rented a house near Disney World from Home Away. I am not recommending their site 100% but it worked for us.

We drove to Disney World. So I could pack coolers, specialty foods, pots, pans, and utensils. I packed all the can't live without specialty foods that I didn't want to risk not being able to find.

I goggled all the grocery stores in the area and printed maps and addresses to each one. (Don't get hung up on finding the chain you use locally. I really liked Publix but I had sticker shock from the price increase of the foods. However, they weren't much more than the super Target and were a better quality.)

Before we went I created a meal plan for each day that include snacks. The meal plan included the days we were driving to Disney World and home.

I then planned which days I would go shopping and created specific shopping lists for each shopping trip. I planned when I would bake or cook. This takes considerable amount of time so don't overlook allowing yourself time to cook and bake when planning where you are going that day.  A couple of days I made two meals and put the leftovers in the fridge so the following night I wouldn't have to cook.

We had a blast. The trip did require a lot of work for me. A couple of times I started a little pity party for myself. It would have been so much easier to just buy food or go out to eat. However, I tried not to let the pity parties last very long. I do need to accept the restrictions food sensitivities place in my life and stop comparing what I am doing to everyone else. This is a work in progress for me.

So Disney World is possible and it can be fun even if you have food sensitivities or allergies.

Affermation on being thankful!

Please don't take this blog post as being preachy. I am writing it for myself to remind me to be thankful.

I am struggling with shopping. I am struggling with my weight loss goals. I am struggling with not eating foods I shouldn't.

I need to remember all the times my children were sick. The days and days of them feeling miserable and laying on the couch doing nothing but watching T.V. in a daze.

I need to remember all the trips to the doctors office. Repeatedly over and over for the same infection. More and more antibiotics that got stronger and stronger.

I need to remember that even the times my children were "well" they were sick. So many times we couldn't do something because Benjamin had a headache or just didn't have the energy to leave the house.

The countless loads of bedding I washed.

The medication my children use to take every. single. morning. I use to make little towers out of the pills and inhalers to entertain my children. Why did I think this was a good thing?

Benjamin's mood swings.

Benjamin's tantrums.

Benjamin pretending to trip over nothing and pretending that he was hurt just for attention (so I thought - yep, a lot of guilt over this one still).

Worrying that I was raising a sociopath.

The trips to the emergency rooms with 105+ fevers, and one trip with a really low temperature.

The nights I would lie awake worrying if this round of medication was going to work. What would happen if they ran out of stronger medication to give my children before they got better?

Sitting beside Zachary's bed watching him sleep because he was struggling to breath with asthma and pneumonia.

What do I have now? 

Zachary is 13 years old and is 5' 9" tall. In the last 2 years he has been on antibiotics one time for strep throat. He has no large patches of warts on the bottom of his feet. He doesn't have problems with nocturnal enuresis anymore. Zachary hasn't had pneumonia since 2012. Zachary doesn't take any medication. Zachary has gone from being obese to a healthy weight.

Benjamin is 12 years old and is 5' 5" tall. I really don't remember the last time he was on antibiotics. I would guess it is pushing 2 years. Benjamin only has mood swings and starts to loose control when he is reacting and then he recognizes it and asks for help. Benjamin is full of energy and I have a hard time giving him enough physical activity. Benjamin rarely has headaches anymore. Benjamin has gone from being obese to being on the skinny side. I make sure he gets as much to eat as he wants. BUT I do not encourage him to eat more (that one is hard for me - and, honestly, he isn't skinny it is just my distorted body image). 

AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE.... In 2014 for the first time ever I didn't have to use all my vacation days for sick children and we got to go on an actual vacation. We went to Disney World.

I need to remember these things and let them motivate me.

Best Brownies Ever CORRECTION!!

I HATE it when I get a recipe off a blog and it turns out terrible. Not just a little bad but an absolute disaster and you just know there is no way that blogger has even attempted to make the recipe.

So my sincerest apologies for doing that to you. It was an honest mistake.
 
After I made the brownies of my last post two times. Then I wrote the blog post. I waited two weeks to see if my children reacted. No one did, so I made the brownies again.
 
They turned out terrible! They were really gooey and obviously didn't have enough flour in them.
 
I blamed the bad brownies on Ben (sorry Ben). He had measured out the dry ingredients and I assumed he hadn't measured something incorrectly. I made a second batch and measured everything myself. They turned out exactly the same terrible way, exonerating Ben.
 
Now when I get a recipe off the internet I print it up on an 8x11 paper. Then I proceed with hand writing in all the changes I am going to make. I always cross of the salt. Salt is for the most part not needed in any recipe, it is just their for taste. Next I substitute the flours. A quarter of the flour needs to be a starch. Then the remaining flour I substitute twice as much rice flour. I always start with this mixture and then if I want the recipe moister I will use more oat flour and less rice flour. But this also makes the item more dense and heavy.
 
So if this recipe I did 1/2 cup arrow root starch, 1 cup rice and 1/2 cut oat. Now when I was converting I started to do 1 cup oat and 1/2 cup rice because I like dense moist brownies. However, I scratched out the measurements and changed them to my standard substitution.
 
When I remade the batch of brownies after the batch Ben measured I almost put in 1 1/2 cup oat flour because the "1" wasn't scratched out very well. So long story I must have put in 1 1/2 cup oat flour in the first batch I made.

I made a batch and use 1/2 cup arrow root starch, 1 cup rice and 1 1/2 cup oat flour and they turned out really good (like the first two batches.)
 
So one would think that this is the end just always use 1/2 cup arrow root starch, 1 cup rice and 1 1/2 cup oat flour. But then I made another batch of brownies and they were terrible. So now I really have no idea what is going on.
Currently the good and bad brownie batches stand at 2 good batches, 2 bad batches, 1 good batch, 1 bad batch.
 
Okay maybe I have some idea. The last batch of brownies I used 1/2 cup tapioca starch because I was out of arrow root starch and I had a different type of olive oil than I normally buy. So I am hoping it is one of those two things.
 
I have to go shopping for arrow root starch and olive oil. I will try yet again and let you know.

In the mean time I would NOT recommend trying the brownie recipe I posted.  Sorry for anyone's wasted time and ingredients. I know the ingredients are not cheep.
 
Also, stay tuned for muffin recipes. I have a good banana muffin recipe an I am working on zucchini muffins and carrot muffins.